They say you don’t truly understand a person until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes. I now understand that phrase a bit better! My Dad and I have been close friends all my life - too similar at times (my mom would say) but apparently I didn’t understand him until I tried to walk a mile in his impossibly large shoes!
There are some things about Dad that I’ve come to understand and then there are other things that I will never understand!
A few things I’ve come to understand:
1-You can never shut off your farm brain. The farm will be on your mind CONSTANTLY. It doesn’t matter if it’s the 15th of November at 9pm and everyone has been at home for hours. You may have a great idea or think of things that need to be done at some future date. You make wake up in the middle of the night with a great idea. It’s so very hard to shut off your farm brain!
2-I now understand how a human can spend so much time on the phone. I think I spent 70 hours talking on the phone one months (while driving and doing other things of course). People call day and night, vacation and dinner time. I didn’t understand (until now) how you could spend so much time on the phone while on vacation. But now I realize that being on the phone is the thing that allows you to be able to go on vacation at all!
3-The office will never stay perfectly clean. Before Dad left, i used to think I would keep the office perfectly clean and organized. That lasted…about a day! The mail comes, people bring papers, you go to meetings, you run to fight fires, you think you’ll have time to file, you make a pile to do later etc, etc…. And as hard as you try, the office is never perfectly clean.
4-Notebooks. Dad probably has 10 notebooks at a time in various places around the house and vehicles. “I’ll have one notebook,” I said. Nope. You have one notebook for one thing. You leave a notebook in the truck and someone takes your truck. It’s 3am and there’s another notebook closer to you. There’s an old notebook with something you need. I’ve turned into my father - I understand the notebooks!!!
5-The house is your office. It used to drive me nuts when Dad would leave farm stuff all over the living room and kitchen and laundry room and truck and basement etc… Now, the house is my office. I want space for my projects. I want to spread out and see what i’m doing. I want a pile for this and a pile for that and room to see what I’m doing. I want a fresh environment every once in a while. I move things to talk to an employee in the laundry room or have a meeting in the kitchen. I work while I eat or cook dinner. And before I know it, my stuff is all over the living room, kitchen, laundry room, truck, and basement.
6-It’s not a short attention span it’s a million tiny tasks. We would always razz Dad about having ADD because he would start a project and then take a phone call or go to the door or move to a new project or change rooms etc… You have to! People call. Problems come up. You think of something that has to be done more than the thing you are currently doing. You think of something that has to go on a list before you forget it. And then sometimes you do just get antsy and need a new environment. I can’t believe it…I even understand the need for farm ADD.
A few things I’ll never understand:
1-How to function WELL on limited to no sleep. Dad is AMAZING. He can get a few hours of sleep in harvest and go go go. He wakes up in the middle of the night and studies his scriptures, reads a talk, plans some of the farm etc… and then is ready to go the next day. I’ll never know how he does it!
2-Full Sundays. How did dad have meetings at 5am on Sunday and not fall asleep? How did he sit for hours at a time on the stand and keep his eyes open at times? How did he have interview after interview and stay coherent? Incredible!
3-How to shrug off the stress and the drama. How does he do it? Somehow he has a barrier that only lets in the tiniest bit of stress and drama. Everything else is deflected off his amazing shield of (I don’t even know). He probably has an amazing converter inside his body that changes any amount of stress to energy so he can run faster and harder (literally run…into Walmart, or the parts store, or anywhere…) And when I find that converter…watch out world!
4-How to be a good spouse, parent, son, church leader, farmer, board member, good neighbor, friend, etc…at the same time! I’m amazed every day at the hats that Dad wore when he was here (and all the hats he continually wears) and the way he was able to fulfill his responsibilities cheerfully and with purpose. He was always trying to improve in each area and focus on the people. Some day I pray that I’ll be half the human that he is today!
Love you Daddy!
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